So we all have days and sometimes months when we feel out of sorts. Perhaps it’s a churn in the stomach. Or a Harrumph feeling that comes out of nowhere. Well here are 10 efficient ways to make yourself feel better. They work. They really do.
1. Think back to the best snog you ever had in your life
Pretty self explanatory. May lead to a small pang of sadness if you never see the BEST snog person anymore and are unlikely to again.
2. Tidy a cupboard
This is dead boring but it really does the trick. Grab a bag destined for the charity shop, and one for the bin and work through that cupboard. Be as ruthless as you want. If you are feeling angry, take it all out on the plastic stuff and shout and rant as you wave GOODBYE forever.
3. Make a collage
This sounds like something a dingbat would suggest but if you have time – try it. Grab some magazines, rip out pictures that speak to you and then stick them on a bit of paper. Then laugh at what you’ve created and toss it in the bin.
4. Have an argument with someone you don’t like and WIN the argument in your head
Make sure you always say something clever and they always lose their train of thought. Think of lots of ways to put them down and mutter them under your breath. Do this again and again until the bad feeling about this person has been expunged from your body and you’re a new woman.
5. Avoid negative people
If someone starts pouring a load of negative crap in your ear, just pretend that your phone is ringing, hold your hand up and walk away. If they keep doing it each time you see them, then make sure your phone is always attached to the side of your head and you’re having an interesting conversation about something deeply personal like your raging, painful scabies/herpes/impetigo.
6. Get your hair done
Don’t get a new style (as this is too risky and can make you feel worse if they fail to deliver on making you look like Alexa Chung again) so just get it washed and blow dried. Read a magazine and pretend you don’t have to work and this is what you do everyday.
7. Pat a cat or dog
Really enjoy the softness of their fur and the fact that they don’t answer back.
8. Eat cheese on toast
Some people will tell you not to drizzle Worcestershire sauce on top but they’re obviously mad.
9. Live a fantasy life
You know when you were a teenager and spent endless days fantasising about being someone else? Well there’s no harm in keeping that dream alive if you’re in need of temporary escape. Create a whole life in your head and fantasy names for your children, spouse and pets. Imagine you are a combination of Oprah, Tina Fey and Sharon Horgan and live in a ten bedroom villa by the coast with Tom Hiddleston as your butler (and it’s obvious he has a crush on you of course). Get all the details right – right down to the kind of bedspread Tom will ravish you on when he brings in your cheese on toast at night.
10. Wash your face REALLY WELL
This sounds simple but at the end of the day (especially if it’s been a trying one), what you really need is a good, long…well face wash? Rub cleanser all over, massage it in, get a hot flannel, press it into your skin, repeat. Just this simple ritual will make you feel like a million dollars. Try it. Please try it.
So any of these things should help you get one step closer to feeling okay. If you can pat a dog, fantasise and eat cheese on toast at the same time, you’ll be in Nirvana before you know it.