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Mums Like Us – A Network For Disabled Mums: The Silver Linings

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Some time ago I posted on the Muns Like Us Facebook group asking for other disabled mums to share their ‘silver linings,’ – the droplets of positivity and cheer, the little advantages to parenting whilst living with a disability. What came back was the most uplifting thread I’ve ever read.

It probably doesn’t say much about me that I kicked things off with, “I can never be the designated driver.” Having to send back my licence ten years ago had a huge impact on my independence BUT I can always have a glass of wine with my

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dinner!

Others mentioned their disability giving them an ‘excuse,’ to rest, sit down, eat cake. These are things we should all have a right to do but societal pressure often keeps us on a skinny latte fuelled treadmill.

Lots of mums mentioned getting priority seating on public transport or at events. I recently got front row seats for ‘In The Night Garden Live.’ I was delighted! Even better if the event in question is for the over 5s! Many of us fight with feeling of guilt on this but honestly? I think we’ve paid our dues.

There’s

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the amazing woman who described having no feet as a silver lining because she’ll never stub her toe again, the woman who wrote that the lack of sensation in her hands was a silver lining because it doesn’t hurt when her sewing needle slips and there was me, citing the joy of not being able to see my spots or grey hairs. If I can’t see them, they’re not there.

On a more serious level, disabled mums are probably less likely to sweat the small stuff. We’ve had to prioritise in different ways to other mums and we’re less likely to panic if our

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little lovelies have a smidge too much screen time or struggle to use a knife and fork. We’ve overcome a lot to get where we are and we continue to adapt and evolve as parents, doing a really fabulous job despite the challenges we face.

The biggest blessing for me however, is bringing up my children to be utterly accepting of disability and diversity. The unique experience of having a disabled parent who would do anything for them teaches children courage, independence, resourcefulness and determination. It also shows them that they, like their

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parent has done, can overcome obstacles life will throw at them and be amazing, whatever they choose to do.

I am not suggesting it’s all sunshine and roses. Mummying is hard, whoever you are. But finding the silver linings in any situation can give you the strength to power through another day. 💛

@mums _like_us
www.mumslikeus.org

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- 16 Mar 18

Some time ago I posted on the Muns Like Us Facebook group asking for other disabled mums to share their ‘silver linings,’ – the droplets of positivity and cheer, the little advantages to parenting whilst living with a disability. What came back was the most uplifting thread I’ve ever read.

It probably doesn’t say much about me that I kicked things off with, “I can never be the designated driver.” Having to send back my licence ten years ago had a huge impact on my independence BUT I can always have a glass of wine with my dinner!

Others mentioned their disability giving them an ‘excuse,’ to rest, sit down, eat cake. These are things we should all have a right to do but societal pressure often keeps us on a skinny latte fuelled treadmill.

Lots of mums mentioned getting priority seating on public transport or at events. I recently got front row seats for ‘In The Night Garden Live.’ I was delighted! Even better if the event in question is for the over 5s! Many of us fight with feeling of guilt on this but honestly? I think we’ve paid our dues.

There’s the amazing woman who described having no feet as a silver lining because she’ll never stub her toe again, the woman who wrote that the lack of sensation in her hands was a silver lining because it doesn’t hurt when her sewing needle slips and there was me, citing the joy of not being able to see my spots or grey hairs. If I can’t see them, they’re not there.

On a more serious level, disabled mums are probably less likely to sweat the small stuff. We’ve had to prioritise in different ways to other mums and we’re less likely to panic if our little lovelies have a smidge too much screen time or struggle to use a knife and fork. We’ve overcome a lot to get where we are and we continue to adapt and evolve as parents, doing a really fabulous job despite the challenges we face.

The biggest blessing for me however, is bringing up my children to be utterly accepting of disability and diversity. The unique experience of having a disabled parent who would do anything for them teaches children courage, independence, resourcefulness and determination. It also shows them that they, like their parent has done, can overcome obstacles life will throw at them and be amazing, whatever they choose to do.

I am not suggesting it’s all sunshine and roses. Mummying is hard, whoever you are. But finding the silver linings in any situation can give you the strength to power through another day. 💛

@mums _like_us
www.mumslikeus.org

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